You might laugh at the middle aged guy who buys the flashy sports car, and / or starts wearing his hair in a pony tail – but he may have just found something that works for him! Many of us get to a stage in our lives where we start to question where we are and what we’ve achieved. This generally happens at a time in our life which is commonly known as “mid life” and is commonly termed a “mid life crisis”. The key to this is goals …..
Dr Bob Montgomery, a Clinical and Forensic Psychologist, recently interviewed on radio, discussed the need for goals in our lives to help us overcome this. He stated that a mid life crisis generally occurs where there are a lack of goals that mean something to you at that stage of your life. You may have started out with some goals that meant something to you but you’ve either achieved them or they are no longer relevant: they may have lost their appeal or never had any to start with! Regardless, it’s the lack of appealing goals that are rewarding for you that can be the start of a mid life crisis: the lack of things to do that appeal to you.
Dr Montgomery supports the view that it happens to both men and women – although we generally think of it as being evidenced by middle aged men driving around in a convertible or demonstrating in other such ways. Mid life crises in women is often thought of as menopause, however, a study at Latrobe University of this showed hormone levels were the same as other women – it was, in fact, the lack of rewarding activities that differentiated those women who were going through “mid life crisis” from those who weren’t. One example cited was that often women who were homemakers get to the stage where the kids have grown up, hubby has developed his own interests and all of a sudden she’s no longer doing anything that gives her a sense of satisfaction. For men it’s often around career no longer fulfilling them to the extent it once was: may be a long held dream to do something completely different!
Regardless, the “cure” for a mid life crisis for both women or men is the same: start by setting some goals that are meaningful for you at that time; replacing activities that no longer appeal to you with some that do. Find new interests, perhaps a new career.
It’s about gaining that “sense of excitement” that may be missing – in whatever way works ….
Goals are the key …. humans do better with goals.
Coaches work with clients to develop and implement goals, and hold them to account for the activity which will lead them to goal attainment. Jo Attard of PeopleEdge Coaching & Consulting often works with individuals who, in their forties and fifties (and sometimes older) look to change career to something they may find more rewarding – thus alleviating the “mid life crisis” ….. It is often doing something totally different, a long held passion, perhaps. It’s difficult to do this on your own – having a coach, a “partner” in your journey, will help you to achieve what you want to achieve.
Want to avoid that mid-life crisis? Want something different in your life? Contact Jo for a confidential chat and see how she can help you!
Jo Attard is a professional, Masters degree qualified Executive and Career Management Coach & Consultant and Academic who works with individuals and organisations to help them “be the best they can be”. With significant years’ experience within both Corporate and Not For Profit sectors, Jo is passionate about seeing her clients succeed in their areas of interest. Contact Jo at firstname.lastname@example.org for more information.